Occasionally we’re all on the wrong side of a debate, some more than others. However, if you’re determined to be an insufferable clod in a debate then follow these simple tips. Stick with it, and maybe someday a respected actor will parody you in a viral video.
1. Use anecdotes as concrete proof
Yeah, but I know as a fact that when I was unemployed that it was easy to get another well paying job. If these lazy people would just try harder they wouldn’t be poor.
2. Bring a political slant into a debate where it doesn’t belong
Did you see the news story about the girl that was mauled to death by her golden retriever? The dog was probably a typical liberal, unemployed and wanted more handouts from its owner. Then it attacked when the entitlements weren’t enough.
3. Use poor grammer and stuff
Their are some people determined to sound stupid irregardless of the quality of there arguments.
4. Project yourself onto your opponent
You’re a judgemental name-calling asshole.
5. Attack the person instead of the debate
It’s only because your parents raised you without any sense of morality that you support abortion.
6. Know Everything
Well according to the second law of thermodynamics, there is no way that Justin Bieber will have another number one hit.
7. Despite a mountain of evidence to the contrary, maintain your position
So yeah, vaccinations may not cause autism right now, I’m just sayin’ in a few years it’s likely.
8. Correlation is always linked to causation
Damn, it’s cold outside. Global warming my ass.